TOW Joey Lies through his back teeth
by Joey4GSWarriors
Summary: Joey is Way OOC Beginning of Season 9


TOW Joey lies through his back teeth.

**Author's Note: **Hey there everyone, this is a new story, maybe a two shot, but certainly no more than that. I have massive exams, and I just had this Idea, as I was about to go to sleep, I do like a bit of angst, and so read and Enjoy the fruits of my late night labor. I am only fourteen so cut me a bit of slack. It should be consistent. Please Read and review and tell me what you think of the new Joey!

**Setting:** Before the one where Joey proposes but after the one where Emma is born, so Rach is Recovering, Joey is Way OOC maybe even psychotic, but love will make a man do crazy things!

_Rachel is in the recovery room and Joey is sitting down. Ross has just left, to go to talk to Monica._

Joey feels something on his back.

Joey: What the Hell. (Joey's thoughts) " Oh my god this is an engagement ring, wait a minute this means that they would be together forever, why would Ross try to steal Rachel from me" (Pockets the ring) I-I have to go.

_He leaves_

Rach: Huh what's eating him, where's Ross, Ross ROSS!

_Ross runs in_

Ross: What's wrong is there blood, do you need a doctor, a nurse, painkillers, what?

Rach: Can you bring me my purse?

Ross: Sure Rach, actually there was something I wanted to ask you. (Reaches into his Jacket) Huh.

Rach (Testy) What!

Ross: Well I uh, I uh Just wanted to… to… ask you about the living arrangements.

Rach: Why would they change, do you want me to move out, do you?

Ross: No. I have to go.

_He leaves._

Joey: Hey Rach, I have to tell you something. I saw Ross hitting on this Chick outside.

Rach: WHAT! I just had his baby, and he is hitting on some Hospital slut. I mean what about that kiss we had, why would he risk US again, I thought we could start something up, again but I guess not.

Joey: I understand that, and I also heard what Janice told you, and I guess I just wanted you to know, that you wont be alone in this because, Rachel Karen Green I have never loved anyone except maybe Kate, as much as I love you, and I know you don't return my feelings yet, but will you marry me.

_Hands her Ross' engagement Ring_

Opening Credits

Rach: Yeah Sure why not.

Joey: I'm going to go tell everyone.

_Joey Leaves excitedly._

Rach: Aw Crap, I'll just pretend until Ross is Jealous.

_Cut to the Cafeteria, Chandler, Monica and Ross are there._

Chandler: So you were going to propose.

Ross: Well that was the Idea, but I couldn't find the ring.

_Joey runs in._

Joey: Rachel and I are engaged.

Monica: What the Hell! I have to go see her; she isn't thinking straight, Joey I wouldn't be too excited, she probably would have said yes to me.

Joey: (almost sobbing) What the Hell do you know Monica, you married Chandler because you were desperate for Kids, we all know, otherwise you'd be with Richard.

_Monica leaves_

Ross: you traitor. You planned to propose to the mother of my daughter in her hospital bed. I think I'm gonna be sick.

_Ross runs out._

Joey: Chandler, I know I can count on you to stick by me.

Chan: Not this time Joseph, what you said to Monica and what you did to Ross, you are lucky I'm taking to you.

_Fade out to scenes of Ross and Rachel together, all those 'Moments that they had._

_To the tune of Come fly with me._

_Fade from that to the Recovery room, Rachel is there, reading Cosmo, Monica bursts in all Monica-ey and red in the face, in the words of the great Chandler Bing, "THE VEIN IS BIGGER THAN I'VE EVER SEEN IT"_

Mon: You're engaged to Joey,

Rach: Yes, Is Ross jealous yet?

Mon: He's being physically sick I think.

Rach: Great.

Mon: Can I ask you a few questions?

Rach: Shoot.

Mon: Thank you, I'll start with why the hell are you doing this.

Rach: Like you don't know, your bastard of a brother went and stuck his tongue down some intern's throat. And then Joey proposed and he was so vulnerable, and I couldn't turn him down.

Mon: Wait, Rachel, apart from when he was with you, he came out to see me and Chandler for like two minutes, I can promise you he never left my sight, besides it isn't like Ross.

(Rachel Goes to Interject) And if you say Copy girl, I will rip your fallopian tubes out with my bare hands.

Rach: Much as I hate to admit it you are right, but why did Joey tell me that.

Mon: Wait; Joey told you that. Lemme see that ring, (Janice like) OH My God, that's my grandmother's ring, did Joey act weird before he proposed.

Rach: Yeah he sat down on Ross's Jacket and… NOOOO! Oh my god, Ross was going to Propose, he loves me back.

_Joey and Phoebe walk in._

Joey: Hey Sweetums

Rach: Don't call me that, this engagement has ended.

Joey: Wait, you cant do that.

Rach: Oh but I can, you lied about Ross, then you stole his ring in order to Propose.

Joey: Lies all Lie.

Phoe: Joseph Francis Tribbiani Jr. you listen to me, we know that you lied.

Joey: Shut up and listen. Rachel you slut, my father is in the mafia, I never told you guys this, because I knew you would laugh. But if you break this engagement. I will kill not only Emma but Ross too.

Rach: What do I have to do to not make you kill them.

Joey: Tell Ross, that I am the real Father, cut him out of our lives and marry me…

_Ross and Chandler have been standing there for a few minutes, they know now…_

_AN Pretty OOC huh, yeah I know its Cheesy what with the Italian mafia. And if anyone says racist in the reviews I will flip out. Joking but still… Please R and R. BTW don't worry this is a Ross and Rachel story. _


End file.
